Scars
by Lucyinthesky1996
Summary: Ralph knows Jack has a secret. He wears long sleeves in the heat, he dismisses the idea of going home and he refuses to let anyone touch him. After a heated confrontation, Ralph finds out for himself what Jack is hiding.


Ralph had decided to ignore it at first. But that didn't mean he stopped noticing.

It started off in small doses; every time Jack walked, Ralph could see him wince and all of a sudden his body would go stiff, making movement almost impossible without pain. Whenever the littleuns got too close to him he'd cower away, as if paranoid that they'd come into contact with his skin. On hunting trips, Robert and Maurice would tell Ralph tales of how Jack always treaded carefully and never let anyone come near him, as if there was something he was trying to hide. He never removed his shirt, he let himself swelter inside the material.

All of them noticed but chose to ignore it. Except Ralph that is.

* * *

His suspicions had started the day on the beach. Ralph had been building shelters for hours when someone had knocked into him and caused his almost-finished-shelter to collapse, much to his annoyance. Naturally, he was furious and turned to see which clumsy oaf had been brainless enough to almost knock him over.

Well, he wasn't expecting it to be Jack.

"For God's sake Jack, do you _know_ how long I spent working on that?" he snapped a little more harshly than he should have.

Jack had keeled back, cringing, "Sorry…"

"You really need to watch where you're going!" Ralph's hand became a fist and he raised it without meaning to.

Jack, like a startled dog, had cowered backwards, shielding his face. At first, Ralph wondered what on earth he was doing. Then he realized his fist was in the air and understood; Jack thought he was going to hit him.

"Jack…" he'd said, gentling his hand and reaching out to touch the scared boy's cheek, "…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap. I wasn't going to-"

Jack cowered away again and made a hasty retreat back into the forest.

* * *

Another time was shortly after Jack had told Ralph how he felt about them and they'd started secretly seeing each other. They'd got to holding hands and exchanging small, delicate kisses but during a long passionate kiss, whenever Ralph attempted to put his arms around the older boy, Jack would suddenly break away.

"Jack, what the heck?" Ralph said, after Jack had shied away once again, "That's the fourth time you've done that"

"M'sorry" Jack replied awkwardly, "I just feel like we're going too fast"

"Since when have you ever worried about going too fast?"

"Look, I just don't feel comfortable" Jack's voice was starting to get edgy.

"Save your excuses, I know the real reason. You think I'm unattractive, don't you? All you need to do is tell me, you don't need to make up some stupid excuse-"

"I don't think you're unattractive! Anything but!"

"Then why won't you let me touch you?"

Jack had sunk his teeth into his lip, on the verge of tears, "I-I can't tell you..."

Hurt and upset, Ralph had turned and left sobbing, making Jack feel sick from guilt.

* * *

The third time was the most worrying.

He and Jack were watching the sunset, also hoping to spot a plane at the same time. Jack's arm had gone a little tense around Ralph's neck and the younger boy knew something was on his mind.

"You know Ralph...what if we stayed here?"

Ralph looked at him properly, "What? Jack, we can't stay here!"

"We could. Maybe the grownups have forgotten about us. Maybe...maybe they'll never come"

"How can you say that? Don't you miss your parents?"

Jack hadn't replied. He didn't say another word for the rest of that evening

Ralph was sick of it. He was sick of Jack constantly hiding in his shell. His own self-esteem was going downhill, worrying that he wasn't good enough for the red-head. He decided it was time to get the truth out of him, one way or another.

He waited in the cave until Jack had arrived back from his hunting trip and when the older boy entered, he stood.

"Did you have a nice day?"

Jack shrugged, "It was alright"

He went over and kissed the blonde, but this act of affection was not returned.

"What's wrong?"

Ralph kept his glare, "What's going on Jack?"

"What're you talking about?"

"You. You've been avoiding me for days. You won't let me touch you. What have I done wrong?"

"You've done nothing wrong"

"Then why are you behaving like this? Like I _disgust_ you?"

"You don't disgust me"

"Then _talk_ to me Jack. Tell me what's wrong"

"I can't"

"Jack-"

"I _said_ I can't! Why can't you just leave me be?" Jack almost shouted and he turned to leave the cave again.

"Oh no you don't" Ralph grabbed him by the wrist before he could move, "You're not going anywhere"

"Let me _go_" Jack snapped, tugging to get his arm free.

He tugged too vigorously and the sleeve of his shirt tore.

"Great! See what you've done? That'll take ages to mend!"

Ralph didn't reply. He was looking at the large bruise on Jack's shoulder. Jack followed his gaze and quickly covered it.

"Where'd you get that from?" Ralph asked nervously.

Jack's cheeks flushed and he said nothing.

"There are some on your neck too"

"Get off"

"Jack, they look painful"

"I'm fine, quit nagging"

"They're all over your neck. What did you_ do_ to yourself?"

"I-I fell"

"You clumsy thing, come here, let me kiss it better"

"No, you don't need to..." Jack trailed off, as Ralph started gently kissing along his neck. For a moment, it felt so good his eyes slid close and he enjoyed the feeling of warm lips running across his throat. Ralph continued kissing until he opened his eyes, ready to open up his shirt to kiss along his collarbone when he noticed the bruises didn't stop at Jack's neck. They continued, all the way down.

Jack opened his eyes, realising the kisses had stopped and when he saw Ralph's expression, the blood drained out of his face.

"Jack...what're these?"

"N-nothing..."

Ralph touched them awkwardly, "They look sore. Do you want me to get some water for them?"

Only a nod came as a reply. Ralph left the cave and came back shortly with a coconut half filled with water from the river. Jack was already lying on his stomach so Ralph went and knelt beside him.

"You're going to have to take your top off"

Jack's body went stiff but then he nodded and gently leaned on his elbows, easing his shirt off with the greatest care. Ralph gaped at the sight. All along Jack's back were scars from a whip of some sort, as well as an assortment of bruises and welts.

"Jack...who did this to you?"

Jack shook his head, "It's not important"

"Of course it's important, you _idiot_. They look so painful"

"They're fine Ralph, really"

Ralph bit his lip and then removed his own shirt, folding it.

"What are you doing?" Jack asked, his eyebrows knitting together.

Ralph didn't reply; he carefully dipped the fabric into the water and started pressing the cool water onto the wounds. Every touch made Jack wince and squirm but the water was soothing as well as painful. It didn't stop the tears though. He allowed them to run down his face for once and Ralph felt himself blush slightly as the choir boy started sobbing gently, burying his face in his arms. After most of the wounds had been cleaned, Ralph wrung out his now damp shirt and set it on the ground before turning back to the red head.

He decided to let Jack cry. He needed to, after bearing those horrific injuries for that long. He stared at Jack's slightly tanned back and gently ran a finger down his spine.

"Ow…" Jack's voice was mumbled and heavy on tears, a side to Jack Merridew that Ralph had never seen.

Gently, he leaned over and started kissing the horrid bruises that lined up his back, hoping it would help ease the throbbing. Jack grimaced at first but the soft pecks soon gentled him and he closed his eyes as Ralph tenderly caressed him. When Ralph had kissed all the way up to his shoulder blades, he rested his chin on one of Jack's shoulders and spoke into his ear.

"You poor thing…"

Jack almost laughed, "I'm not. I deserve it"

"That's not true Jack"

"I deserve it because I'm bad"

"You're not bad. Well, you're not always _good_ but no one's perfect"

"I'm a bad son. I deserve to be beaten"

"Who beats you?"

"My father"

_That figures_, Ralph thought, eyeing the scars again.

"Father says I deserve it. Because it's my fault Mother died"

"That's rubbish Jack"

Jack turned his head, looking at him through wet eyes, "Don't _your_ parents beat you if you're bad?"

"Of course not! Well, obviously I've been smacked before but never _beaten_."

"I always get beaten if I'm bad. Normally father uses his belt but when he's really angry, he uses a switch"

"Jack, that's _horrible_!"

"But I deserve it because I do bad things"

"Like what?"

"I forget to do things, I make mistakes and sometimes I answer back when I'm not supposed to"

"You and everyone else in the entire world!"

"That's not good enough for father"

Ralph couldn't believe what he was hearing. He ran a hand down Jack's back again, feeling the welts and scars. It brought tears to his eyes.

"Jack…" he surrounded him in a hug, resting his cheek against his shoulder, "…Jack you don't deserve any of that. Why didn't you _tell_ me?"

"I thought you'd think I'm disgusting"

"How could I ever think..?" Ralph trailed off, too overwhelmed, "Is that why you don't want to go home?"

Jack nodded his head, "A deserted island is better than going back to that place"

"Oh Jack…" Ralph felt the water leave his eyes, "…that's awful" he gently rubbed his cheeks against Jack's neck.

"You won't tell anyone will you?" Jack asked worriedly.

"What do you take me for? A snitch?" Ralph laughed, "I won't even tell Piggy"

"I'll hold you to that"

They both laughed at that, though their eyes were still overflowing with tears. Jack turned onto his back and started kissing Ralph's neck, finding the pain in his back was now easier to ignore.

"Jack?"

"Mm-hm?" Jack replied, still kissing.

"You know that I dig scars, right?"


End file.
